Your Toilet Is Spying On You

The pathological hysteria over Wu Flu has reached a new level with college administrators locking students into their dorm after Sunday evening’s excrement tested positive for C-virus.

More than 90 F&M students forced to quarantine on campus after positive wastewater test

htt ps://

By Alex Geli, 19 September 2020

More than 90 Franklin & Marshall College students residing at the Brooks College House on campus were required to quarantine this week after the college’s wastewater testing picked up a positive COVID-19 case inside the dorm.

It’s the latest complication brought on by the coronavirus pandemic, which, despite various health and safety precautions on campus, has reared its ugly head at F&M and other Lancaster County colleges.

Some would call that a feature.

F&M, according to data released Tuesday, has had nine total cases of COVID-19 — eight students and one faculty or staff member — and nearly two dozen students in quarantine. The college releases COVID-19 data once a week on Tuesdays.

Wikipedia says 175 staff and 2,400 students. 9 of 2,575 is 0.35% of population year-to-date who are known to have ever had the disease. No deaths. Yep, it’s time to start welding shut the doors of their plague houses.

An additional 92 students living in the Brooks College House were asked to quarantine in their rooms Monday to prevent a spread of COVID-19 inside the building. All 92 were tested the next day, and not one tested positive, college spokesman Peter Durantine said. The students who tested negative no longer had to quarantine, Durantine said.

One, they apparently tested the sewage on a Sunday. I presume because they fear the students are going to weekend parties and hobbies and study groups, and they hope to detect infections between the victim walking home from initial exposure and waking up in the morning to attend his online classes.

Paranoid much?

Two, don’t tell me they were “asked” to quarantine. Not one of 92 students went for a walk on a summer day?

Three, it was a false positive which calls into question the legitimacy of their testing methodology from theory to practice. I’ve heard from several medicos-who-would-know that the testing methods to replicate virus particles into detectable quantities are untrustworthy below a certain threshold of starting material. In this context, authorities are looking for individual viruses hiding in a college dormitory’s worth of untreated sewage. Might the testing be inaccurate when being applied to such a difficult situation?

Four, the false positive might even have been on the other end. If they actually did catch it literally at the exposure point then the person testing positive/symptomatic could have been a week in the future. Not that I’m advocating for two-week lockdowns because somebody’s used condom tested positive for a Chinaball. I’m saying we need to have a conversation about false positive rates, to say nothing of institutional paranoia.

And five, Administration never apologized for either the privacy invasion or the overreaction. They might not even have told the students about the sewage testing; it’s not quite mentioned by name in their COVID guidelines.


htt ps://

“Surveillance systems should detect the emergence and spread of infection within the general community and within specific campus populations” through the periodic testing of a sample of randomly selected asymptomatic students or higher risk groups.

End segue

Does anybody think that sewage testing will stop at C-virus? Alert, potential opioid epidemic in progress, second floor! Males in Brooks House are wanking too much! Larry didn’t eat his vegetables! ROHYPHENOL DETECTED DATE RATE DATE RAPE!!!!!

The positive case picked up by the college’s wastewater testing is believed to have belonged to a student who was already in quarantine, Durantine said.

“Can I use your bathroom?”

“I ain’t going back to jail!”

F&M officials have selected five wastewater testing sites within the on-campus sewer system, each one corresponding to different student housing complexes, including Brooks. The new testing method was developed by Eurofins Scientific, a Luxembourg-based company with laboratories in Upper Leacock Township.


DEP Sanctions Eurofins QC Lab For Water Testing Violations

htt ps://

By Neil Shader, 5 March 2018

Harrisburg, PA – The Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Protection (DEP) will collect a $600,000 penalty from Eurofins, QC (EQC), for violations related to falsified and mishandled discharge water tests and results at their lab in Southampton, PA.

“DEP relies on accredited, third-party laboratories to conduct testing and ensure that regulated entities are complying with state laws and regulations,” said DEP Secretary Patrick McDonnell. “Falsifying records and mishandling samples undermines the trust that DEP places in labs like EQC, and we will not hesitate to penalize labs that do not meet our expectations.”

You don’t penalize labs that falsify data. YOU STOP USING THEM AND CHARGE THE PERPETRATORS.

DEP first discovered possible violations in December 2016 while conducting an audit of EQC’s whole effluent toxicity testing (WETT) results, which are used to determine compliance with National Pollutant Discharge Elimination System (NPDES) regulations. Testing results reviewed in the audit found sample results that appeared to be photocopies of previous data sheets, with minor edits made. The lab’s accreditation expired in February 2017 and was not renewed.

Three years later and they’re still getting municipal contracts. These guys are the definition of Deep State. They falsified data to support whoever the crony was, then when they got caught after years of it the only punishment was a half-million fine against an international corporation grossing 4.5 billion euros per year. One hand washes the other.

After being alerted to the questionable results, EQC hired a third-party auditor to review records from the facility. That audit found hundreds of cases of manipulated or falsified data, as well as hundreds of missing records, and cases where samples were mishandled.

End segue

The goal is to catch COVID-19-positive tests before an outbreak occurs.

That is a lie. The goal is a police state–unchecked paranoia inevitably forms into a police state–and I found precedent in Cold War Germany.

Stasi smell museum

htt ps://

By Cory Doctorow, 3 July 2007

The Stasi — East German secret police — kept an enormous museum of “smell samples” of German citizens, kept in case they ever needed to give hunting dogs the scent of a fugitive criminal.

The thing about the Stasi is that they illustrate just how daffy any totalitarian authority structure necessarily becomes. Tyrants all have their Rasputins, mystic goonybirds whose theories about human biology, governance, magic, and life end up steering the state into ever-tighter circles of rabid tail-biting.

Naw, really?

After the fall of the Berlin Wall, many astounding revelations came to light about the Stasi, the East German secret police. One of the more bizarre activities the Stasi was found to have engaged in was the collection of Geruchsproben – smell samples – for the benefit of the East German smell hounds. The odors, collected during interrogations using a perforated metal “smell sample chair” or by breaking into people’s homes and stealing their dirty underwear, were stored in small glass jars. Many of the remaining East German smell jars are on display at the Stasi Museum in Berlin. They are also described in Stasiland by Anna Funder.

Back then, it was stealing dirty underwear in case of guilt. Now, it’s channeling sewage into a laboratory for preemptive testing.

The more things change, the more they stay the same. Not least of which being the powertripping Socialist bureaucrat’s fascination with poop.

3 thoughts on “Your Toilet Is Spying On You

  1. So to sum up, 90 people quarantined because of a test performed by a discredited shit-testing company. Ok, discredited sewage-testing company.

    If the left were not so stupid, they might be ashamed…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. If the left were not so stupid, they might be ashamed…

    Unfortunately, it’s not a left-right thing, it’s an EVERYBODY thing. The entire freaking planet has lost its collective mind, and no one is embarrassed about it. There is no “shaming” insane people into (what was once known as) common sense, only “bitchslapping” them back into it in some efficacious manner yet to be discovered).

    Liked by 1 person

  3. it’s not a left-right thing, it’s an EVERYBODY thing

    Fair critique. The actions of the GOP in the US and Conservatives in Canada are hardly great examples of how to improve your nation. In many ways they are less damaging than their opponents. But when it comes to trying to take authority away from fathers, these “right wing” groups sometimes seem worse.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s