At least they didn’t call it soap. This post is Exhibit “B” in my claim that the next James Bond film will need a literal exorcist.
Lashana Lynch will play 007 in new James Bond movie: report
By Lee Brown, 14 July 2019
James Bond fans wanting 007 to be either black or female are in for a double treat — with the movie spy about to be played by a black woman, according to a report on Sunday.
Only one such fan. Her name is Phoebe, an out-and-proud Satanist, and she’s more of a co-writer than a fan.
British actress Lashana Lynch, 31, will be introduced as the new 007 in what is being described as a ‘popcorn-dropping moment’ in the franchise’s 25th movie that is currently being filmed, according to the Mail on Sunday.
Not even female… an androgyne. A vibrant Pajama Boy, right down to the facial expression. This is the future decreed for us by our cultural Elites: no more male or female.
But it is not a complete do-over — with her just taking James Bond’s secret agent number after he retires from MI6, the report states.
Bond himself will still be played by Daniel Craig — and will still adhere to his old-fashioned macho characteristics, an insider told the UK paper.
‘Bond, of course, is sexually attracted to the new female 007 and tries his usual seduction tricks, but is baffled when they don’t work on a brilliant, young black woman who basically rolls her eyes at him and has no interest in jumping into his bed,” a source told the Mail.
Why would Bond be sexually attracted to her? She’s done everything short of chopping off her nose to make herself repulsive to men.
The insider called it a “pivotal scene” when Bond is called back from retirement and introduced to Lynch as the new 007.
“It’s a popcorn-dropping moment. Bond is still Bond but he’s been replaced as 007 by this stunning woman,” the source told the Mail.
Oh, how cute. James Bond is going to helpfully mentor his not-English, not-male replacement who hates his misogynistic stinking guts. Just like the #MeToo wimminz in real life! “Why won’t any high-value men give me everything he ever earned in life before I can ruin him with a false accusation?”
Londoner Lynch, who played the fighter pilot Maria Rambeau in “Captain Marvel”, is hoped to modernize the franchise criticized by many as being too dated and sexist.
“This is a Bond for the modern era who will appeal to a younger generation while sticking true to what we all expect in a Bond film,” the source said.
“There are spectacular chase sequences and fights, and Bond is still Bond but he’s having to learn to deal with the world of #MeToo.”
That could have been entertaining.
“M, I broke another skank can I please have another.”
“That’s the fifteenth premeditated murder of your assigned partner this week, James. Human Resources is breathing down my neck about your rampant misogyny!”
“Okay. Do you want it quiet or to send a message?”
“NO, JAMES! You weren’t given a license to kill so that you could dispatch your own countrymen!”
“They’re not our countrymen, M.”
The silver lining on this turd is that it will be a COLOSSAL financial failure. Sadly, the Converged are okay with that. They aren’t in this for the money. Oh, they’ll steal all of it they can, but then they’ll burn the rest of the money because that’s what their Father in Hell does. Kill, steal and destroy. Not to GAIN anything.
How can humanity still be in denial about Christ? How visibly and loudly does Original Sin need to be spelled out for us? We’re already up to IMAX 3-D on that scale.
I make a prediction: along with those car chases and fights, Bond #25 will have a sacrilegious scene in a church. The devil would like that.