Deck the Halls With Daddy Issues

Feminism is ugly. Normal, natural, healthy human behaviors are corrupted into the maw of the all-consuming Convergence. Here’s example #(Finite).

I’m Not Seeing My Trump-Loving Family On Christmas And I Couldn’t Be Happier About It

By Ashley Scoby writing for the Huffington Post, 20 December 2018

This Christmas will be the third one I haven’t spent in my hometown. It’s a small town in southern Kentucky filled with more than its fair share of Donald Trump bumper stickers and Confederate flags. But even before Trump was elected president, it always made me feel claustrophobic.

The end of this holiday season will also cap the second calendar year I’ve gone without speaking to my parents, and by extension, the rest of my family. My holidays are no longer spent at my grandparents’ house with my parents, sister, uncle and random cousins. My parents helping to put Trump in office was the final nail in the coffin of a relationship that had long been rocky.

And despite people’s well-intended (but unnecessary) sympathy, life has never been happier for me.

One of my regular stops on youTube had bad family too, Barbie. She kicked his father out of the home, spent the chilamony money on herself, fed her kids expired twinkies fished out of a 7-11 dumpster for a treat and when he was no longer useful as a meal ticket, abandoned him so traumatically that he ended up with a false memory. That’s why he doesn’t talk to family.

You ungrateful piece of Wimminz Studies work.

My parents are passionate conservatives and attempted to raise me as a Baptist (I knew early on that wasn’t going to work for me). My parents complained about everything from interracial marriage and rap music to women going for summer jogs in shorts they believed to be too short. My mother literally highlighted Bible passages she claimed “proved” Barack Obama was the Antichrist. When NFL draft pick Michael Sam kissed his boyfriend on live TV, I nearly cried. I grew up in a house full of sports fanatics and this was a beautiful ― and groundbreaking ― moment. My parents only talked about how “gross” it was.

It’s not natural for a girl to be that opposed to her parents’ beliefs. She either had young love with Tyrone or Daddy gave her a slutphone… not much difference, really.

Because of my family’s beliefs, I spent most of my life hiding my politics, my interests, my dating life and my friends from them. For decades, they didn’t know the real me, only the façade that I put on for them. My parents had no idea that when I left the house on a typical high school weekend night, I was probably spending time with my gay best friend. They didn’t know I voted for Obama (shocker ― he didn’t turn out to be the Antichrist). They didn’t know I donated to Planned Parenthood. Almost everything I love or am proud of in my life would probably make them cringe.

It’s extremely not natural for a girl to be that extremely opposed to her parents’ beliefs. One thought is Daddy was a massive hypocrite but that seems unlikely. Child violators like to hide among the Left, not among Baptist Trumpers waving the Dixie.

For a fact, Ashley was shamelessly promiscuous.

Holidays always seemed to exacerbate the canyon that yawned between us and, for as long as I can remember, my anxiety has spiked during November and December. A chronic eye-roller, I had to siphon every bit of self-containment I could to make it through Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners ― and daily life, if I’m being honest ― with my family.

This is 100% on her. One of my close relatives still donates to the Carter Foundation. We get along.

Eventually I came to realize our vastly different beliefs had little to do with “politics,” a blanket descriptor often used in situations like this that greatly oversimplifies the rift between my family and me. Our differences have to do with vastly opposing views of what every human being deserves (health care, LGBTQ rights, a world without Confederate flags, etc). Trump being elected ― and my parents helping him with their votes ― was more than I could take. It was the wake-up call I needed, and it finally shook me free from the society-imposed guilt that kept me hanging onto my family ties for years.

The day after the 2016 election, my mother and I had a heated discussion on the phone ― the first extensive one we’d had about politics in years. She proudly declared her support for Trump and said my dad had voted the same way. I hung up. I always knew my parents were wildly conservative, but in my heart of hearts, I didn’t think it would go this far.

Trump Derangement Syndrome. I still haven’t grokked it. Somehow, a sexy, masculine conservative being in charge is emotionally traumatic unto psychosis for bitter women who hate unsexy men. Do feminists hate themselves for wanting to be Trump’s domestic love slave? Did they expect the Lizard Queen’s ascendance to herald the literal castration of all men everywhere? Is Satan merely venting his frustration at this eight-year delay through his weaker minions?

I let the anger linger in silence for a couple of weeks. By the time my parents realized I wasn’t contacting them anymore, I had gathered all my thoughts. My dad finally called, wondering why I was freezing them out. I was on my way to Kansas City at the time and had an uninterrupted 45 minutes while driving to deal with the situation. After that? I knew I would be done. I was at peace.

Leftoids need to live in a bubble. It’s not just their ideas are indefensible, it’s that they’re badly damaged human beings who cannot tolerate the healthy.

So I drove down Interstate 70, my phone to my ear, and finally let 23 years of differences bubble up into speech. I was the most open I’d ever been with either of my parents. I told my father, for the first time, about how I’d been groped on a New York City street. How could he vote for a man who had admitted to doing the same to other women?

Did you tell him about your underage bisexual experiences? No? Seems that being “groped on a New York City street” would not be as sexually traumatic. What was a Kentucky girl doing in NYC anyway?

Can you imagine if Bill Clinton had ever groped a woman? *snicker*

I brought up our differences when it came to topics like race, religion and women in leadership positions. It probably wasn’t a complete shock to them ― I’ve often slipped throughout the years and said “liberal” things. But I don’t think my parents ever knew our differences were this severe or would signify the end of our relationship.

Why should they have? None of those are legit reasons for breaking a family.

In most arguments I engage in, my temper comes quickly. I get flustered, and I often cry when I’m frustrated. But this was the calmest I’d ever been during a confrontation. I never cried. I never yelled. I didn’t have to. We knew it was over.

Since that day, I’ve spoken to my parents only once. I showed up at their door with two boxes a couple of months later and went straight to my old room to collect whatever I might someday want to keep. My mom followed me down the hall, berating me about how “ridiculous” I was being. The entire interaction lasted about 10 minutes as I grabbed photos off the wall and old books I thought I’d want. I took what I could because I knew I wouldn’t be back. The saddest goodbye was to the family dog, Zoe. Every other separation was a long time coming.

Many young people these days would kill to have had happily married parents. But Ashley’s only concern was “You didn’t vote for First Female President when you had the chance”.

It’s strange ― with romantic attachments, we’re taught to recognize the red flags and act accordingly. We’re told, “Remember your worth” and “Being alone is better than being in a bad relationship.” We’re told, “Get out if someone doesn’t respect you or your beliefs.”

That’s advice for battered spouses and it doesn’t work.

But with our family relationships, we’re often guilted into staying no matter how toxic the situation. We’re pressured into trying to make it work with people who are often viscerally at odds with everything we believe in ― because it’s the “right” thing to do.

Intact families please God, who is working hard to form a permanent, eternal family. Ruined families please Satan for the same reason: God is working hard to form a permanent, eternal family.

It’s Christ worship, not guilt, to do right by obnoxious family members.

What’s more, we’re told that if we decide to leave or distance ourselves from our family, it’s “immature.” “Can’t you just talk it out?” we’re asked. Or better yet, we’re told, “Can’t you just not talk about politics?”

But what use is that?

Seriously, Ashley? Of what use is not talking about irreconcilable politics? Your father did you no wrong, you rebellious bitch. You tried to control him, failed and abandoned him to live “free” in a cesspit of sex, drugs and the politics of envy. There’s a spiritual metaphor in that.

Why would I want a relationship that needs to constantly be policed to avoid fighting or the realization that we have nothing in common? Why would I want a relationship limited to surface-level conversations about work and sports in order to steer away from discussing topics that truly make us who we are? I know I can’t change the way they think or feel. They’re not changing my beliefs. How valuable is a relationship where you have to hide or lie about who you really are?

The Converged cannot understand that family is more important than politics, that not every aspect of life must be bent to fuel the Narrative… and that most of our side’s opposition to Convergence is founded on exactly that principle. We want to go play, they want us to wave the freak flag. #Gamergate

So, after years of dreading the holidays, I finally took control of my life and created my own version of home ― of family.

Last year, I crammed 15 of my friends into my tiny living room and hosted my first Friendsgiving in my own place. Some of my friends were gay. Some were black. One had parents who immigrated from Mexico. It was a hodgepodge of characters and identities, a mosaic that illustrated what already makes America great.

Free tampons! Easy sex with fags! No borders! No white men! No families! No God! Everybody united in political loyalty to my tender feelings! That’s what makes America great!

And I knew that no one there would make racist or sexist comments while digging into their turkey. No one would claim Jay-Z was a devil worshipper (I actually witnessed this at a family gathering). No one would (unironically) talk about how nice of a guy Ted Cruz seems to be.

Says the girl who was careful to include homos and coloreds in her holiday.

Note, Jay-Z is a famous rapper who is married to Beyonce and in retirement, became a major supporter of Barack Obama and sodomy. He’s a devil-worshiper but not because of his music.

I didn’t have to feel anxious and I didn’t feel anxious. It was the first time on a holiday I’d ever truly felt at home.

This year, I took a week before Thanksgiving and drove eight hours back to the region where I grew up. Toggling between Kentucky (Louisville and Lexington) and Indianapolis, Indiana, I crashed in my friends’ studio apartments and spare rooms, drinking wine and revisiting old college haunts.

A lot of women who reject family life end up drinking wine… socially, alone and for a hobby.

But at the end of the week, I turned south. I drove back to my hometown, rolled down the main bypass and straight through the traffic light that, had I turned left, would have taken me to the house I grew up in. I wasn’t there to see my parents. I wasn’t there to silently sit on a couch surrounded by relatives I had nothing in common with but my genes. I drove back there not to see relatives, not to fight a losing battle, but to spend time with those who actually felt like family.

Family is not defined by feelings.

My best friend from high school and her husband hosted me for two days and made me an early Thanksgiving dinner. We sipped Kentucky bourbon and talked into the night about politics and old friends. I tried to explain all of Drake’s rap beefs, and we laughed in a way I wasn’t used to laughing during the holidays. This was the kind of Thanksgiving I’d been missing all those years: no anxiousness, no bitter fighting, no quiet resignation to just keep my head down and find a way to get through the meal.

When people find out I’ve cut my family out of my life, they often apologize and ask if I’m sad. But I’m not sorry, and I’m even less sad. My parents, unfortunately, brought me more stress and grief than anyone else in my life. Naturally, there are days I mourn the absence of strong family ties. But I certainly don’t mourn the loss of my own toxic family ties.

Avoiding Trump voters was the impetus for me to finally break away. But the journey was building my own happiness ― free of an arbitrary obligation to a family I not only had nothing in common with but whom I actively disagreed with on fundamental issues that illustrate who we are as people.

Satan himself couldn’t say it better. Go build your OWN happiness instead of enduring the “arbitrary obligations” of people who love you regardless of political loyalties.

It’s not a situation I would wish on someone ― of course, there are times I wish I had blood relatives I was close to. But the peace of mind and the happiness I’ve found these past couple of holiday seasons without my family? I would wish that joy on everyone.

And you legislate us accordingly, dividing wives from husbands and children from parents, because Gloria Steinem forbid that we be permitted to not make the same mistake you did.

Ashley Scoby is a native Kentuckian, a University of Kentucky graduate and a recovering sports writer. She’s now a freelancer living in Kansas City, Missouri.

Her father’s only clear mistake was sending Ashley to college. He was also ignorant of her young promiscuity but that’s hard to hold against him—fathers are generally the last to know. But if Ashley now being a “freelancer living in Kansas City” is any indication, he was manly enough to cut off support after she hated him for voting Right.

Dead career, no longer welcome in her home lands of Kentucky and Indiana, writing for Huffington Post about how she disowned her family for voting Trump and remembering their roots. What should we get her for Christmas, a cat or a bottle of cheap wine?

It’s not often one encounters so pure a specimen of Feminism’s endgame.


5 thoughts on “Deck the Halls With Daddy Issues

  1. ‘I told my father, for the first time, about how I’d been groped on a New York City street. How could he vote for a man who had admitted to doing the same to other women?’

    How could he have known you were groped if you didn’t tell him initially?

    Wimminz…we aren’t mind readers about your feelz here.


  2. While Ashley may (think she) hate(s) her daddy’s guts, it is a given that when (not “if”) she’s broke, homeless, and starving to death, he’s the first person she’ll come crawling back to, begging for relief.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. @ferriker…

    The only question I’d have to that is if she’d have the self awareness to realize that.

    After all the parable was about the prodigal son and not the prodigal daughter. Of course that could have been fathers didn’t let their daughters go into a foreign land in those days.


  4. I notice often when they are starving and broke they jump to the next Tyrone or Chad or as a last resort the Boring Bill (who’s got is life together but is clueless about manipulative women) rather than coming back to their father…thus perpetuating the cycle.


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